MSPARP- Karkat: Meet ZIIIM!

carcinoGeneticist [CG] joined chat. ~~ 1 ~~

Invader ZIM [ZIM] joined chat. ~~ 2 ~~

CG: HELLO. WHO ARE YOU?

ZIM: I AM ZIIIM!

CG: IT SAYS YOU ARE AN INVADER, IS THAT TRUE?

CG: YOU HAVE CAUGHT MY INTEREST.

ZIM: YES I AM AN IRKEN INVADER

CG: AHH. I SEE. YOUR TURN TO ASK A QUESTION, *ZIM*.

ZIM: WHAT SPECIES ARE YOU?.... WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS.

CG: THE NAME IS KARKAT AND I AM A TROLL BUT I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD PLENTY ABOUT OUR SUCCESSFUL OVERRULING OF THIS UNIVERSE

ZIM: NO, I HAVEN'T, ENLIGHTEN ME YOUNG TROLL.

CG: BEFORE I DO ANY *ENLIGHTENING* I WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU CALL YOURSELF AN INVADER IF I'VE NEVER HEARD OF ANY IRKEN INVADERS.

CG: SO

CG: YOU FIRST

ZIM: I WAS SENT TO PLANET EARTH TO DESTROY IT. AND MAKE IT APART OF THE IRKEN EMPIRE.

CG: YOU WERE SENT TO TAKE OVER EARTH? HAHA! HOW DID THAT GO?

ZIM: UNSUCCESSFUL

CG: SO I GUESSED CORRECT

CG: WHAT KEPT YOU FROM VICTORY?

ZIM: MY PLANS

CG: FAILURES?

ZIM: YEP

CG: OUCH. I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS

ZIM: YOU DO?

CG: YEAH... IT SUCKS TO GET SLAPPED IN THE FACE WITH A FAILED PLAN OF YOUR OWN CREATION

ZIM: YES, IT DOES. I ALSO HAVE A STUPID HENCHMAN, HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING!

CG: I HAVE A WHOLE TEAM THAT CAN'T DO ANYTHING

ZIM: THAT MUST SUCK

CG: ABSOLUTELY

ZIM: I CANT EVEN IMAGINE THAT... DO HUMANS MESS WITH YOU TOO?

CG: YOU HAVE NO IDEA

ZIM: I DO, I THINK

CG: YEAH?

ZIM: YEAH

CG: THERE'S THIS ONE HUMAN WHO REALLY PISSES ME OFF. I NEVER KNEW I COULD HAVE FEELINGS SO BLACK FOR SOMETHING SO INFERIOR!

ZIM: BLACK?

CG: MEANING I HATE HIM

CG: A LOT

ZIM: OH

ZIM: I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT A HUMAN, HE IS ALWAYS TRYING TO RUIN MY PLANS AND EXPOSE MY SECRETS! I HATE HIM!

CG: SEEMS WE'RE BOTH ON THE SAME PAGE HUH ZIM?

ZIM: YEAH, IT SEEMS SO.

CG: YA KNOW, YOUR NOT BAD. YOU'RE SURPRISINGLY COOL

ZIM: REALLY?

ZIM: THANK YOU

CG: SURE THING.

CG: I HAVE A QUESTION

ZIM: YOU'RE NOT SO BAD YOURSELF, KARKAT.

ZIM: AND YES?

CG: OF ALL THE PLANETS TO TAKE OVER, WHY EARTH?

ZIM: I WAS SENT HERE BUY MY TALLEST, I DONT KNOW WHY.

CG: ARE YOU SAYING THAT THE ONLY REASON THAT THEY ARE IN CHARGE IS BECAUSE THEY ARE TALL?

ZIM: YES

CG: THAT IS STUPID

ZIM: WHY IS IT STUPID? HOW ARE PEOPLE SELECTED TO BE IN CHARGE ON YOUR PLANET?

CG: BLOOD COLOR

CG: HE RARER THE BLOOD, THE HIGHER YOU ARE

ZIM: THATS STUPID

CG: I AGREE

ZIM: EVERYONE ON MY PLANET, EXCEPT FOR THE ALMIGHTY TALLEST, ARE SHORT.

CG: REALLY? WELL IN MY GROUP, I'M THE LEADER EVEN THOUGH I'M THE SHORTEST

ZIM: YOU'RE TALLER THAN ME THOUGH.

CG: LUCKY ME. I AM TALLER THAN A SPECIES THAT IS NATURALLY SHORT

ZIM: WELL AT LEAST ITS SOMETHING

CG: I GUESS... HEY, BY ANY CHANCE HAVE YOU HEARD OF... NEVER MIND

ZIM: I HAVE A QUESTION, KARKAT.

CG: YES?

ZIM: ARE YOU HATED BY, WELL... EVERYONE?

CG: .... SOMETIMES I FEEL THAT WAY...

ZIM: I KNOW I AM

CG: I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT

ZIM: NO ITS OKAY

ZIM: I AM THERE TO DESTROY THEM

CG: NO IT'S NOT OKAY BUT I DO UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL

ZIM: YOU DO?

CG: YEAH. THAT FEELING THAT NO MATTER WHERE YOU TURN, SOMEONE HATES YOU, AND IT FEELS LIKE AN ENDLESS TERRIFYING CARNIVAL RIDE.

CG: SOME PEOPLE EVEN WANT ME DEAD.

ZIM: YES, I HATE THAT FEELING. DIB WANTS ME DEAD.

CG: DIB? SO YOU DO KNOW THE WEIRD KID!

ZIM: KNOW HIM?! PFFT! HE PRACTICALLY LIVES AT MY BASE!

CG: WHEN I FIRST FOUND THE PLANET, HE KEPT SENDING ME THESE CREEPY TRANSMISSIONS ABOUT HOW HE'LL CATCH US ALL! WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM?

ZIM: HE IS **** OBSESSED **** WITH ALIENS!

CG: WHY? ALL YOU'RE DOING TO THEM IS SAVING THEM FROM THEIR UNTIMELY DEMISE AND SUFFERING BUT DESTROYING THEM AND TAKING OVER. I MEAN, THAT'S NOT EVEN THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN!

ZIM: I DONT KNOW WHY! BUT HE NEEDS TO GO!

ZIM: DID HE EVER FIND YOU?

CG: HELL NO! I WAS DISCREET WHEN IT CAME TO TALKING TO HIM

ZIM: I BET

CG: HE WAS INTERESTING AT FIRST BUT THEN I JUST GOT ANNOYED

ZIM: HE

ZIM: IS

ZIM: SO

ZIM: ANNOYING

ZIM: YOU

ZIM: HAVE

ZIM: NO

ZIM: IDEA

CG: HE IS PRETTY SMART THOUGH. I HAD TO SEND A HIM A VIRUS TO GET HIM TO BACK OFF AND SOMEHOW HE FIXED THAT AND WAS CHATTING YET AGAIN AN HOUR LATER

ZIM: YOU ARE SO LUCKY

CG: HOW SO?

ZIM: HE COMES OVER **EVERYDAY**

CG: OH MY GOD

ZIM: YES

CG: CAN'T YOU JUST BLOW HIM UP OR SOMETHING?

ZIM: NO

CG: WAIT... YOU'RE BLACK FOR HIM, AREN'T YOU?

ZIM: I HATE HIM, YESS

CG: I FORGOT A SMALL DETAIL WHEN I EXPLAINED BLACK FEELINGS

CG: BLACK MEANS YOU HATE HIM SO MUCH YOU LOVE HIM

ZIM: ....

CG: I KNEW IT!

CG: THAT'S WHY YOU CAN'T BLOW HIM UP!

ZIM: *BLUSHES*

CG: NO NEED TO BE EMBARRASSED. I KNOW THE FEELING ALL TOO WELL

ZIM: ITS DIFFERENT!

CG: *SMIRKS* SURE IT IS

ZIM: IT IS!

ZIM: HES A HUUUUUMAN

CG: *LAUGHS* LIKE I SAID, I KNOW THE FEELING!

CG: I'M NOT LYING!

ZIM: HOW SO?!

CG: I'M SORT OF IN THE BLACK QUADRANT WITH A HUMAN MYSELF

ZIM: WELL IM SUPPOSED TO DESTROY ALL HUMAN LIFE!

CG: YOU CAN'T DEFY THE QUADRANTS.

ZIM: AARGH!

CG: *CONTINUES LAUGHING*

ZIM: *FLIPS TABLE* FUCK THIS!

CG: FLIPPING OUR SHIT ARE WE?

ZIM: YES!

ZIM: *FLIPS A COUCH*

CG: AND I THOUGHT *I* HAD A TEMPER

ZIM: *SHOUTS IN ANGER*

ZIM: FUUUUUUUUUUCK!

CG: DONE YET? HEHEH

ZIM: *BREAKS A VASE AND SITS IN A CORNER, RUBBING HIS TEMPLES* IM GOOD, FOR NOW

CG: *LEANS CASUALLY AGAINST THE FLIPPED COUCH* DEEP BREATHS, ZIM. DEEP BREATHS.

ZIM: *GROWLS AND MUMBLES TO HIMSELF*

CG: HEHEHEH

ZIM: *GLARES AT KARKAT*

CG: YES? MAY I HELP YOU?

ZIM: *STANDS UP AND SIGHS* IM GOOD NOW

CG: NO, IT'S BEST TO LET IT ALL OUT NOW. SO

CG: LET IT OUT

ZIM: I JUST DID

CG: ALL OF IT?

ZIM: YEAH

CG: OKAY, GOOD

ZIM: WAIT

ZIM: *FLIPS A COFFEE TABLE*

ZIM: OKAY

CG: *LAUGHS* I KNEW THERE WAS STILL SOME IN THERE

ZIM: I AM NOT CLEANING THIS UP

CG: NO WORRIES, I'VE HANDLED WORSE

ZIM: I NEED AN ASPRIN

CG: IT'S COOL. WE ALL HAVE OUR DAYS

ZIM: *CLOSES HIS EYES FOR A MINUET*

CG: *FLIPS THE COUCH BACK OVER AND PLOPS DOWN ON IT*

ZIM: *JOINS HIM*

CG: *LOOKS AT YOU* SO NO MORE FLIPPING ANYTHING THAT CATCHES YOUR EYE? IT WAS GETTING ENTERTAINING

ZIM: I MIGHT LATER

CG: GREAT. I'LL BE SURE TO HAVE THE POPCORN READY IN ADVANCE

ZIM: *CHUCKLES*

CG: I GUESS THE SAYING *THE SHORTER THEY ARE, THE HIGHER THEIR TEMPER* IS TRUE

ZIM: IS THAT A REAL SAYING?

CG: *LIES BACK* NOPE. *LAUGHS QUIETLY*

ZIM: *PULLS HIS GLOVES OFF* IM GOING TO CLAW SHIT NEXT TIME.

CG: *RAISES A FINGER TO THE FABRIC OF THE COUCH AND RIPS THROUGH THE MATERIAL BEFORE LYING HIS HAND DOWN AGAIN*

ZIM: *STANDS UP AND WALKS OVER TO THE CURTAINS*

CG: ZIM?

ZIM: *HE DRAGS HIS CLAWS DOWN THE CURTAINS*

CG: *SMILES AND LIES BACK AGAIN*

ZIM: *HE STARTS TO CLAW AT THE CURTAINS, THEN EVENTUALLY RIPS THEM OFF AND FLINGS THEM ACROSS THE ROOM*

CG: *DUCKS TO THE FLOOR AS IT FLIES ABOVE HIM* WOAH!

ZIM: *GOES BACK TO THE COUCH AND SITS BACK DOWN* OKAY I THINK IM FINE NOW...

CG: *GETS BACK UP AND SITS DOWN AGAIN* FOR NOW.

ZIM: SORRY

CG: IT'S OKAY

ZIM: *SCRATCHES THE COUCH ONE TIME*

CG: *HEARS THE BEEP OF HIS HUSKTOP AND HURRIES OVER TO IT, READING THE MESSAGE ON THE SCREEN*

ZIM: WHAT ON IRK WAS THAT?

CG: *HE SLAMMED THE HUSKTOP SHUT AND LEANED AGAINST THE WALL, BACK TO YOU*

ZIM: ....

CG: *HE SMASHED HIS FIST INTO THE WALK, GOING THROUGH IT WITH SUCH EASE. NO WORDS LEFT HIS LIPS*

ZIM: *HE SMILED AND WATCHED*

CG: *HE SWIFTLY PULLED OUT A SICKLE AND SLICED THROUGH THE HUSKTOP AND THE DESK IT SAT UPON, CAUSING IT TO COLLAPSE ONTO THE FLOOR*

ZIM: *HE HELD IN LAUGHS, AND THE TEMPTATION TO GIVE KARKAT A LASER*

CG: *HE JUMPED ONTO THE COUCH, HIS FACE BURIED IN THE CUSHION AND MUMBLED* FUCKING ASSHOLES....

ZIM: WHAT HAPPENED?

CG: *HE TURNED ONTO HIS BACK AND LOOKED UP AT YOU* LET US JUST SAY THAT SOMEONE THOUGHT SCREWING WITH ME WOULD BE FUNNY... THE JOKES ON THEM...

ZIM: SOMEONE? WAS IT THE HUMAN?

CG: SADLY, NO.

ZIM: ANOTHER TROLL?

CG: YEAH

ZIM: OH *HE SEARCHES AROUND IN HIS PAK AND PULLS OUT A LASER* DO YOU NEED THIS?

CG: JUST A DUMBASS JUGGALO. NO NEED FOR THAT...

ZIM: *HE SHRUGS AND PUTS THE LASER BACK* OKAY

CG: *STARES AT THE CEILING AND SIGHS*

ZIM: WHAT DID HE DO? OR SHE...

CG: HE TRIED TO SCARE THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF ME

ZIM: SCARE YOU? HOW?

CG: I'D... RATHER NOT TALK ABOUT IT, OKAY?

ZIM: OKAY, THATS COOL.

CG: THANKS

ZIM: YEAH NO PROBLEM

CG: HEH...

ZIM: SO

ZIM: WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW?

CG: THIRSTY?

ZIM: NO

ZIM: I DONT THINK WE DRINK THE SAME STUFF

CG: WHAT DO YOU DRINK?

ZIM: I DRINK

ZIM: IRKEN STUFF

CG: *LAUGHS AND HANDS HIM A COKE* HOW ABOUT YOU TRY THIS?

ZIM: *LOOKS AT HIM* CAN YOU OPEN IT?

ZIM: *HOLDS HIS CLAWS UP* I CANT

CG: *OPENS IT AND HANDS IT BACK TO HIM*

CG: *PULLS ONE OUT FOR HIMSELF*

ZIM: *SNIFFS IT AND TAKES A DRINK* WOW

ZIM: THAT BURNS MY THROAT

CG: YOU OKAY?

ZIM: YEAH

ZIM: I WOULD BE SCREAMING

CG: DON'T DIE MAN

ZIM: I WONT, I HOPE

CG: THAT WOULD MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHIT

ZIM: *TAKES ANOTHER DRINK* I LIKE IT

CG: *GULPS IT DOWN* I PREFER IT OVER PEPSI

ZIM: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT IS

CG: JUST GO WITH IT *SMILES BEFORE FINISHING IT OFF*

ZIM: OKAY... *TAKES ANOTHER DRINK BEFORE SETTING ON A TABLE THAT MIGHT BE FLIPPED*

CG: *LOOKS AROUND* THIS PLACE IS TRASHED

ZIM: YEAH IT IS, THATS MY FAULT

CG: I'LL MANIPULATE ERIDAN INTO CLEANING IT LATER...

ZIM: ERIDAN?

CG: A DEAD IDIOT.

ZIM: DEAD

ZIM: WHAT

ZIM: NEVER MIND

CG: GOOD IDEA. JUST DON'T THINK ABOUT IT

ZIM: YEAH I WONT